FROM MAJORCA TO TZFAS

This is a story of a descendant of forced converts. Mrs. Sara Parfeonov shares her story with Devorah Leah Halperin

HISTORICAL RECORDS

_{Majorca, Spain, a history class. All the students sat nicely in their places, listening to the teacher describe the period of the Inquisition. The teacher mentioned that “many people who live here and students of this school are descendants of forced converts from that time.” The teacher said there are lists where anyone can see which families belong to descendants of forced converts.}

_{I was 12 and what my teacher said reverberated in my head. I went home and asked my parents whether our family descended from anusim. They didn’t give me a clear answer.}

_{I sat at the computer and began reading up on the subject. I examined lists and found that both my mother and father’s sides were on those lists. That made me feel very connected and I began researching many subjects in Judaism online and asked lots of questions on various forums. I acquired a lot of knowledge but it all remained theoretical.}

_{When I was learning about descendants of anusim in Majorca, I came across an article about a woman who gave up her life, preferring to die by fire and even encouraged her family members to do the same and not convert. To my surprise, her name was Katrina, the same name my parents gave me when I was born, for my paternal grandmother. The story made a deep impression on me.}

FROM THEORY TO ACTION

_{When I was 18, I saw on some website that there was a synagogue in our city and there was a phone number listed. I called and was told that once a month, someone came from Eretz Yisroel to give a series of lectures.}

_{I came at the appointed time and there was the rabbi, standing in the entrance to the synagogue, graciously inviting everyone into the lecture hall. Rabbi Nissan Ben Avrohom (also a descendant of anusim who converted, has smicha, lives in Shilo and is the father of 12 children) gives workshops and lectures around the world. He taught me both hashkafa and Halacha. This was the stage when I began to move from knowledge to starting to do mitzvos.}

_{Some descendants of anusim still have traditions that connect them to the Jewish people. In my grandmother’s house, for example, there were separate knives for meat and milk. There was a man who was a professional chef and also slaughtered animals for the entire community. He said that in his parents’ home they kept meat and milk dishes separate. Another person in the community remembers his grandmother saying “Modeh Ani” with him.}

_{Around that time my parents divorced. My mother moved to Italy with my brother, and my father remained in Spain. I decided that I was interested in converting and joining the Jewish people. I was unsure where to convert since, for the people from Spain who want to convert, it takes a long time because a rabbi comes only once in a while. The process is very slow there.}

MOVING TO THE HOLY LAND

_{At 22, I decided to move to Eretz Yisroel. I felt that this was the best place for me to join the Jewish people. At that time, I knew someone from a forum by the name of Chaya Yaakobi. I shared my life with her and that I wanted to convert. Chaya, seeing how serious I was, began convincing me to come to Eretz Yisroel. She offered to host me, which sounded mighty strange to me. Why would a stranger be so happy to host me and give me something for nothing? This was something I had never encountered until I met Chaya. It was my first introduction to the amazing giving of Chabad.}

_{I stopped over in Italy on my way to Eretz Yisroel and spent time with my mother. When I told my family about my decision and ordered a ticket for Eretz Yisroel, I got endless phone calls to dissuade me. To them, Israel is a war zone and a desert and there is nothing there for a normal person.}

_{I packed my suitcase, and between placing each item, my aunt, another relative or a friend called to persuade me to drop my plan. But I was determined to go ahead with it.}

_{I boarded the plane and said “Modeh Ani.” I knew that G-d is with me. It gave me the strength and faith that everything would work out as I took this huge step. I was going to Eretz Yisroel and joining the Jewish people! I didn’t know that I still had quite a way ahead of me.}

_{I landed and the Yaakobi family met me at the airport. On the way to their house in Lud, we passed by a market where Arab children went around barefoot. This is precisely what my mother was talking about, I thought to myself; this is not the Eretz Yisroel that I imagined!}

SHORT PRAYER – ONLY TWO HOURS!

_{I did not understand Hebrew and I tried to connect with this wonderful family with hand motions and facial expressions. It was rather difficult, but my disappointment soon dissipated. I had arrived for the first night of Chanuka and the entire extended family gathered to light the menorah. I felt uplifted.}

_{After I recovered from the flight, I wanted to progress with my Jewish learning, prayer and the practices I had started. In the shul in Spain there were siddurim with Spanish translation. I went out to look for one. When I found it, I discovered it cost 500 shekels, which was all the money I had at the time. Not possible. I went back to the house downcast; I couldn’t even pray.}

_{One of the nephews saw that I was sad that I could not read Hebrew and he began teaching me. He opened to the first page of the siddur and taught me the letters, vowels, and how to read “Modeh Ani.” There was a period of time when it took me two hours to pray even a short prayer!}

_{Chaya’s mother would sit with us with a pile of books. She had a Tanya with a translation and explanation in Georgian and other Sifrei Chassidus. She would explain, and what I didn’t understand, Chaya would translate for me into English. I also attended a Tanya class given by Rabbi Ziv Katzbi and other Torah classes.}

_{When I was living outside of Eretz Yisroel, I would often get sick; I wasn’t that healthy. Once I arrived in Eretz Yisroel and began eating kosher food, I was never sick. When I told my mother, she found it hard to believe. It was only later, when I began learning Chassidus and Tanya, that I understood the effect that food has on a person’s body, and I understood what had happened.}

WHO IS MOSHIACH?

_{I was invited to a Chabad wedding of one of the girls from the neighborhood in Lud. Before the wedding I hesitated about going as I was dressed. Chaya lent me a skirt. At the wedding, I felt that I also wanted a wedding like this with genuine joy, and that I wanted to belong to this lofty ideal. After the wedding, I decided that I would wear only skirts from then on. All the girls in the family and the local area donated skirts from their wardrobes and so I made progress in tznius too.}

_{In order to be accepted for conversion, I registered with the government office in charge of conversions in Yerushalayim and was told to come for an interview. I went and was received by a religious man who began a long series of questions. After a few answers I told him, “I believe in G-d and His holy Torah. I believe in the coming of Moshiach and wait every day for him to come. I don’t want him to come while I’m still not Jewish.”}

_{Then he asked me, “Who is Moshiach?” To his surprise, I said, “The Lubavitcher Rebbe.” He was taken aback. I told him that I’m living with a Lubavitcher family and demonstrated to him that I know a lot about Judaism and keeping mitzvos. He tried to dissuade me from converting, as is customary, but I explained that this is what I really want. He told me to wait for a letter in the mail.}

_{A while later I got a letter of rejection. I was bitterly disappointed and burst into tears. I had no family and my three-month visa had run out. How could I do a quick conversion? At the same time, I was adamant that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving the country. I preferred staying illegally than going back. It was Sukkos, and one of the girls in the family suggested that I speak to G-d in the sukka and ask Him to fulfill my desire.}

_{I said to Hashem, “Hashem, I am with You! From here on in, I will act with mesirus nefesh like Avrohom Avinu who acted without knowing what would result. I am staying in Eretz Yisroel even though I don’t know how the conversion process will progress and about the continuation of my stay here.”}

REBORN AND AGLOW

_{All the Yaakobis and acquaintances tried to help me. One day, Rus, one of the sisters, came with wonderful news. She heard about a private conversion institute in B’nei Brak, run by Mrs. Chana Kagan. I registered at the institute and attended classes. I surprised all the teachers with my knowledge and questions, and I kept on asking them to speed up the conversion. I wanted to belong already! Throughout this time, I did housekeeping work to earn money so when the time came for me to convert, I would be able to go and learn in Ohr Chaya in Yerushalayim.}

_{The day came and the conversion took place at Rabbi Karelitz’s beis din in B’nei Brak. I went there with Rus Yaakobi. The face of the rabbi looked to me like that of an angel. He asked me some questions and then I was brought into a big room where nine impressive looking rabbis sat who also asked me questions. I answered them with great emotion and trepidation. I remember that they asked how long one waits between milk and meat, and I said one hour.}

_{All the rabbis smiled and said it’s not necessary to wait for an hour. I told them that I was living with a Lubavitcher family and that’s what they do.}

_{After meeting with the members of the beis din, I immersed in a mikva and took the name “Sara.” When I left, on a high, Rus, who accompanied me, said, “Sara, you are glowing. You have been born anew.”}

_{When I got to the Chabad neighborhood in Lud, all the people I had gotten to know also said, “Your face has a special light.” I had joined.}

A CIRCLE IS CLOSED

_{I signed up for courses at Ohr Chaya. There were thirty of us girls living in a triplex apartment. The sisterhood, the concern and the caring each had for the other and the endless Ahavas Yisroel in the place are beyond description. Mrs. Yoela Kolton, the house mother, also deals with arranging shidduchim. When she suggested my husband for me, I told her that I want a clear answer from the Rebbe.}

_{Before we met, I asked them to inform the bachur, Zecharia (also a convert, from a Russian background), that I was in the country without the necessary legal papers, which could create a problem in applying for a legal marriage certificate from the Israeli Rabbinate, and that he should be aware of that in advance. When we decided that we were suited for each other, we wrote to the Rebbe, but my husband said that he would put the letter in the Igros Kodesh the next day, because he wanted to go to the mikva first. He called the next day, and told me excitedly that there was a blessing of mazel tov in the letter to which he opened.}

_{After the engagement (“vort”), I had no idea how I would manage the preparations for the wedding, being in Eretz Yisroel without any parental support and assistance and without any savings. However, I saw the constant help of Hashem and how He was always with me throughout the preparatory stages for the wedding.}

_{I went to try on a wedding dress at a gemach that suited me unusually well. I got a call from Mrs. Shoshana Duch, whose family my husband has a strong connection with, and she told me that she has a credit with a wig stylist in Migdal HaEmek. I went there, and the first wig that I tried on suited me very much. The wig stylist told me that the credit did not cover the whole cost, but she would make up the rest from her maaser money. Another friend approached me and wanted me to buy another wig, and she donated half the cost of a wig from a stylist in Yerushalayim.}

_{An American bride, a relative of Mrs. Yoela, who did not know me at all, agreed to forgo some items that would grace her wedding, so that I could use those monies to buy furniture, and the parents of one of the girls in the school bought electrical appliances for us. The girls from the school took care of buying and acquiring for us everything needed for a home, down to the last detail! Additionally, the community of R’ Sender Wilschansky in Milan, where I stayed before the wedding, helped sponsor the costs of the wedding hall. We contacted Rivkin Catering in order to arrange a date for the wedding, and the date that worked out and was available was 20 Sivan, one year to the day from when I underwent my conversion.}

MAKING MUSIC

_{I have been playing the violin since age 6. I grew up with it, and I appeared in concerts and various events over the years. When I began the process of joining the Jewish people, I put away the violin. I felt that all of the songs and compositions that I knew were not in sync with the side of holiness, and I did not want to be associated with them. I thought that all of the many hours that I had invested in my music studies went to waste. However, when I got to Ohr Chaya, Mrs. Yoela Kolton, who also plays the piano, convinced me to use the talent that I was given for holiness and to perform at events for women. Today, thanks to her, I teach private music lessons in my home to the girls from the community.}

DESCENT FOR THE PURPOSE OF ASCENT

_{As mentioned, my original visa was for three months, and I had overstayed my visa in Eretz Yisroel by a long time.}

_{R’ Tuvia Zilberstrom, who teaches in Ohr Chaya, treated me like a daughter and really looked out for me. He attempted, along with the entire staff of Ohr Chaya, to work on my behalf through various means, through recommendations from rabbis and through diplomatic means, but without success. After a period, they said that there was no choice, and in order to get a new visa, I would have to leave Eretz Yisroel, and hopefully they would be able to arrange a new visa for me. I cried a lot, and R’ Zilberstrom told me then, like a loving father, “Now, it is okay to cry, but in front of your husband, try not to cry!”}

_{Having no choice, I traveled to Italy. When I was leaving, at the passport check, the woman clerk began screaming at me, “What, you were here illegally for such a long time? That’s it, now they will never let you come back in.”}

_{I informed my mother in advance that I would not be staying with her, but in the Lubavitch girl’s seminary, Beis Chana, in Milan. She was so moved to meet me after such a long time of not having seen each other, but I already wanted to return to Eretz Yisroel, because I felt that this is my place in the world and I don’t want to be anywhere else. That is where I want to get married and build a home. During my stay in Italy, I felt like my neshama was choking. Eretz Yisroel is my true place, and waiting for me there were: a hall, a wedding, a wedding gown, and wigs. The entire month of my stay in Italy, I did not unpack my suitcase. I was waiting every second for the call that they had succeeded in arranging my visa. In the end the call came.}

TRUE HAPPINESS

_{Early one morning, I got a call from Mrs. Yoela, and she said, “Start saying T’hillim now. I am on the way to the immigration office, together with Meital (a roommate from Ohr Chaya) who works in the Knesset, in order to arrange the hoped for visa approval for you.” Of course, I davened from the depths of my heart, and the visa approval was granted. They told me that originally they were refused the approval, but they would not leave until they got it. It is impossible to describe the happiness that I felt at that time. What is interesting is that the very same day that my friend Meital succeeded in getting the visa for me, she had the first meeting with the person who became her husband!}

_{Mrs. Yoela sent me the approval, which I immediately printed out, and then I ordered a ticket and headed straight for the airport. During my stay in Italy awaiting a miracle, I wrote to the Rebbe many times, and each time the answer was a letter with the date of the 28th (Chaf-Ches or ko’ach) of the month, and I concluded that the Rebbe is giving me the “ko’ach” (strength) to keep going. Actually, the date of my return trip to Eretz Yisroel was Chaf-Ches Iyar.}

_{When I arrived in Eretz Yisroel, I stood on line at passport control and debated about whom to approach with my convoluted story. I decided to approach the clerk with a hair covering. She looked at my passport and said, “You know that you stayed here a long time without a visa extension?” I pointed to the visa approval, and she could not believe how I could have gotten an approval. She stepped out to look into the matter and I was thinking chapters of T’hillim and Tanya. After a few minutes, she returned and stamped my passport, allowing me to proceed.}

_{Boruch Hashem, the Rebbe gave us a bracha for an eternal edifice and blessed upright generations, and we merited having three children in four years. And at the past Chai Elul convention for women, I won a dollar of the Rebbe!}

_***

_{Today, Sara lives in the Chabad community in Tzfas and she can be invited to tell her story in various languages: sara.israel770@gmail.com}