MAY WOMEN DRINK FROM THE WINE OF HAVDALA?

Selected Halachos from the “One Minute Halacha” project

By HaRav Yosef Yeshaya Braun, Shlita,
Mara D’asra and member of the Badatz of Crown Heights

STATUS OF A PRE–TOIVELED GIFT

I received a beautiful glass platter piled with gourmet chocolates as a Mishloach Manos gift from a dear student (with a note that she had toiveled it). Just before Pesach, my family polished off the last of the treats, and now I would like to use the platter for my Shabbos desserts. Does it count that it was toiveled before it was gifted to me, or must I re–toivel it?

The onus of t’villas keilim (immersion of new dishes in a mikva) is on the owner. If someone purchases a dish and toivels (immerses) it with the intention of gifting it to another, there is no requirement for teiva at that time, and it’s questionable whether the teiva is valid in retrospect.

If the gift is being delivered with food on it—as with the candy platter that the student gave the teacher—it may have required teiva first. But this conclusion is not unanimously accepted by poskim; some argue that teiva is not effective if performed before the end–user receives it, even if the gift contained food. Ideally, the recipient should toivel the dish again without a bracha.*

The giver may gift the item without toiveling it first. Taking the stricter opinions into account, the food should not rest directly on the dish—a substantial separation should be made between the food and the dish, rather than a ubiquitous paper liner. However, even if the dish is not covered in this manner, it is still acceptable not to have toiveled it before gifting it. This is especially so in the above example, since the dish was glass, for which the obligation of teiva is d’Rabbanan (of Rabbinic origin); since the teiva requirement for a food–bearing gift is in dispute, there is room for leniency. The recipient of the non–toiveled gift should toivel it before using it.

In order to avoid these issues altogether, it is possible for a giver to pre–toivel the gift—whether it is presented with or without food—under certain conditions. (This would be especially appropriate if there is doubt whether a recipient observes the mitzvah of t’villas keilim.) The procedure is as follows: The giver first makes a kinyan(halachic transfer of ownership) by handing the gift to another person who acts as a shliach (representative) of the recipient and lifts it up on their behalf. Once the kinyan has taken place, it is as if the gift belongs to the recipient, and the giver may toivel it on their behalf.

*An empty metal food utensil received as a gift must be toiveled again, but without a bracha. (Many are stringent to re–toivel even glass dishes.)

OF WOMEN AND WINE: KIDDUSH VS. HAVDALA

It is considered mitzvah min hamuv’char (an optimal level of mitzvah performance) for all participants to taste the Kiddush wine. With regard to Havdala, however, there is no mitzvah for others to partake of the wine. In fact, there are authorities who caution against women drinking the wine of Havdala. The prevailing minhag (custom) is that only the person reciting the Havdala drinks, and neither men nor women listeners sip the wine.

Several reasons have been offered for the minhag of women refraining from drinking Havdala wine. One reason stems from the halacha that a man may not be yotzei from a woman’s Havdala, and a man may not recite Havdala for a woman if he has already fulfilled his obligation.* Some suggest that the custom that men participants don’t drink the wine developed from the restriction on women, while others state that any and all participants should abstain for completely independent reasons.

There is no issue for a woman who makes Havdala for herself (and other women) to thereafter drink the wine.

* There is a halachic dispute whether women have a chiyuv (halachic obligation) in the mitzvah of Havdala. In order for one person to make a bracha for another, there must be at least equal chiyuv.

MUST I PUBLICIZE THAT FOOD WAS PURCHASED WITH MAASER?

In the days of the Beis HaMikdash, a host was obligated to inform guests if serving them food that was set aside for maaser sheini (“the second tithe” of produce that is separated in the first, second, fourth and fifth years of the Shmita in Eretz Yisroel to be eaten in Yerushalayim) or maaser ani (“tithe for the poor” brought in the alternate years of the Shmita cycle), as stated in the Mishna and the Tosefta. There are various reasons enumerated for this practice. Among them are: Serving guests without acknowledging that the food is maaser appears as if the host is utilizing maaser for their own needs—an uninformed guest may even seek to compensate the host for the meal in some tangible way. Causing another to consume maaser unknowingly may constitute g’neivas daas (deception); an unknowing guest may defile the holy food by eating maaser sheini in a state of tuma (ritual impurity).

When it comes to maaser kesafim (the charitable tithe from one’s earnings)—practiced today in all locales—many authorities do not consider it similar to maaser sheini or maaser ani in this respect. Additionally, many of the conditions inherent in maaser sheini are not relevant to maaser kesafim—including constraints of time, place and personal purity—so many of the reasons given to explain the Mishna’s admonition are not applicable.

The issue of personal benefit would apply if the giver extends the monies in a prideful way or with tangible reward, but a general advantage of appreciation would not be in this category. It would therefore seem that there is no halachic impediment to such a practice. Indeed, it is prevalent that tz’daka funds are used for refreshments at events held for the public’s benefit, such as seminars and community affairs—and there is no need for it to be publicized if money earmarked for maaser was used. More so, it would be inappropriate to advertise the source of the funds as maaser if it were to make would–be participants uncomfortable and hesitant to attend the function.

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